Sunday, December 27, 2009

Tales in Pugging, or "The Tank That Wouldn't Rez"

So I join this Underbog with my mage and four of us are brand new.

One guy is dead.

He asks for a rez, we say "Okay, sure, where are you?"

"I need a rez."

"Okay. Where are you?"

"By first boss."

"There are a bunch of mobs between here and there. It'd be better if you ran back."

"Can you rez me?"

"No. You're the tank. You need to run back."


Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Emberstorm vs Stormstrike, or "Battle of the Battlegroups"

In Battlegroup Emberstorm, when using LFG on alliance side, I've had no real personality issues with pugs. I've run about 10-15 on Birdy.

Today I switched to Dustfire on Battlegroup Stormstrike, horde side.

The very first pug I joined with Dusty? The tank had to fetch a drink for his pregnant girlfriend, called her prego (if she doesn't mind then I don't), which then unleashed the moron in one of the dps who started waxing witty on how the tank could have avoided getting pregnant.


This is my first LFG on horde and I get that?

I should have left. Dusty doesn't need the gear and I didn't need to sit and listen to "L2Condom." I should have made a snarky comment and made them wait for the system to fetch them another dps.

But I didn't. Because I suck. I whined to my guild instead, and one of my guildies had the insightful comment "Women don't like condoms." Not sure if he was making fun of the guy or serious. I didn't ask and didn't want to know.

Looking for Group, or "Pug It Up"

The people who leave pug groups are usually the problem.

They tend to be really tightly wound.

Case in point: a tank who said the group wasn't fast enough (at level 64) leaves four pulls in. Same run, the dps who keeps standing in poison leaves after our third wipe on the first boss (whom we get down after he's replaced).

In a level 80 heroic, the tank overpulled and we wiped. Except that this was fine, nobody whined about it, it happens. We picked ourselves up and rezzed, and the guy pulled the mobs again. And dropped group. And what happens when you leave a group tankless in the middle of a pull? Right. The group dies. (Except for the rogue, who vanishes. That'd be me. Ta da!)

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Dev Support, or "What Else Am I Going To Do--Work?"

In my defense, I really have nothing better to do this morning.


WoW Insider has recently become concerned with the mood on the official forums. If you've been reading my blog for very long, you'll feel the smug glow of superiority that we've always known what crap the official forums are. Almost every time I post anything there, I end up in tears.

It's asshat central.

I'm just sorry the asshats got bored enough to go after the devs once they'd driven off everyone else.

My husband says, worst case scenario, he doesn't think the devs will do anything worse than stop talking to the community -- which is still pretty bad, because I'd rather they just ban hammer the jerks than stop talking altogether. (Seriously, Ghostcrawler, if you're out there -- nobody likes those people.)

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Shout Out, or "Still Posting, Say Wuuut?"

Wanted to give a shout out to a reader from Khadgar -- hope your pug was fun! My guildie definitely gave me your greetings and I got all giggly. XD It amazes me that you recognized my guild.

If the Christmas pet is cool this year, I maaaaay ask husband to let me reopen my account to get it. We'll see. <3 If he didn't buy me anything ahead of time, I'm sure I can wiggle that out of him.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

WoW Social Fallacy?, or "Judging Crosses a Line"

A while back, a friend linked a list of 5 Geek Social Fallacies. Read one or two, then come back. I'll wait.

. . .

Done? K.

WoW Social Fallacy #A: Judging Crosses a Line

This is a theory, but I think I have a leg to stand on so bear with me.
  1. I doubt any of us can say we haven't experienced some level of "need" to indulge in the game more than we should.
  2. I believe that nobody can force gaming cutbacks on anyone else. You have to let it happen naturally, when the player is ready.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Hammer of Justice, or "105 Day Suspension for Being Hit Capped?"

A guildie posted this in our forums. Don't know if it's made the rounds yet or not, but just in case it hasn't I thought I'd share. It's from, which is Not Safe For Work.

Kahi was running around yelling "Seal of Command fades, I cast Seal of Command, I cast Holy Shock. He then punched a boy in the mouth and yelled "Hammer of Justice."
If it was my kid I'd hug him for his brilliant spell usage before grounding him for irl hitting someone. Seriously. I wouldn't be able to stop laughing if my child did this. The school administrators would think I was a horrible mother, but I would not be able to keep a straight face.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Best WoW Player, or "This Reminds Me of Something..."

As a teen, I took a writing class at a fancy schmancy art school. I eventually left due to philosophical differences with my professors.

One of those days that clearly marked the difference between them and me, the female teacher told our class a story about a man who wrote 10 pages a day, even on Christmas. Even with a wife and kids.

I was horrified. The guy's poor family!

So when a guildie posted the following on the forums . . .
My hats off to this guy, though I've never heard of him before today.
I wondered . . . is the achievement worth it?

I'm all for achieving what you can, and if he honestly has that much free time, um, okay. But how is this any different from the man who writes 10 pages on Christmas? To achieve something like this, how could Little Gray not neglect everything else?

So my question isn't for Little Gray himself. He obviously has his priorities set with WoW at the top. It's for everyone else, and it's the same question I asked myself about Mr. 10 Pages.

Should we really admire this?

Sunday, November 22, 2009

The Casual Cascade, or "Getting Back In Touch With Life"

I'm not going to say "OMG! WoW stole my life!" It didn't.

But it did steal the rest of my hobbies.

In WoW, we just felt like we had to keep up. Keep up with people who didn't have jobs or school or any other interests. Keep up with collecting, keep up with raiding, keep up with PVP gear, keep up.

Husband looked at me after we canceled our accounts and said, "I used to read."

Friday, November 20, 2009

The Beast, or "I Didn't Say I'd NEVER Post While On Hiatus"

A few days ago, I mentioned we were getting a new kitten. Her name is Alice. Her nickname is The Beast. We've had her for four days.

She's like a really long boss fight.

In the morning, I release her and engage. From 9-5, I'm the main tank while husband works. As long as the office door is open, my main job is to keep kitten aggro.

Except that every time husband moves, it's a Taunt. I have to blow all my cooldowns to keep her off him.

/cast Block
/cast Head Scratch
/equip Toy
/use Toy
/cast Cuddle

Phase 2 is when she falls asleep and I have to be extra-super-still. My last resort is breaking out limited Catnip potions and tossing them at her, as she's easily distracted.

Our other cat sometimes off-tanks, but he doesn't have the dedication to keep her on him all day. Mainly he just looks alarmed and runs away from her (which makes her chase him).

Whew. Kittens! O.o

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Alas and Alack, or "When It's Time to Hiatus"

I mentioned to my husband the other day that the reason we don't exercise anymore is because we spend our spare time playing Warcraft instead.

He agreed.

It made me think about the wisdom of continuing to play a game that keeps you from being as healthy as you can. Sure, some people strap laptops to their treadmills, but most of us don't have that kind of dedication (insanity?).

But this isn't about cutting back or even stopping cold turkey. This is about hitting a point in real life where you need to cut out all distractions and focus.

So, today, husband and I canceled our subscriptions.

It was sudden but necessary. We plan to revisit the option to resubscribe in January.

Considering the game is the only way we see my husband's best friend anymore, this is far from a permanent situation. So please wish us luck in real life so we can get back to our virtual one.


Sunday, November 15, 2009

On Waiting, or "Patience in an Impatient Game"

We adopted a kitten yesterday. Sort of. She needs to stay at the animal shelter a few more days to be spayed and then we can pick her up.

But, see, I want her now. When we first met her, she sat in the back of her cage while her brother meowed at the front. My sister-in-law went "Awww" at the brother and took him out, and my husband said "I like the one in the back being quiet."

So I took her out and cuddled her. And cuddled her. And cuddled her.

We wanted a lap cat, someone who likes to snuggle as much as Tiger hates it. A yin to Tiger's yang.

We found this little black and white cutie who purred without wriggling or meowing as I held her, totaling about ten minutes of pure cuddly snugs. I actually cried when I had to put her back.

We put a down payment on her adoption after checking the other kitties and failing to bond with them like I did her.

But I still have to wait for her.

I'm going crazy.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Arena Tips, or "How Husband Says He Could Change My Mind"

This is going to be a joint post with husband on how people who don't really like arenas could potentially learn to love them.

I personally hated them for the following reasons:
  • We queued at slow times, so each battle had a 10 minute wait.
  • I hate being forced to do things to get any benefit (i.e. 10 games a week requirement).
  • I hate spending much time on something I'm ambivalent about.
  • The titles mean nothing to me.
  • It wasn't very fun.
Husband's Gladiator friend told him that to progress in arenas, it's all about grinding out games. Do a ton every week and your rating will creep up, especially in the first weeks of a season. That's just not attractive to me at all.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Rumor Mill, or "Career Gankers on Zuluhed?"

I got this info from a guildmate who talked to one of the subject's former guildmates, so take this as you will.

My brother blacklisted an alliance guild that only has a couple of guys in it, all with weird letters in their names. They camped him while he was trying to solo Chillmaw. Note that it was a group camping one person. My brother could have taken any of them one-on-one (probably even two-on-one) but not all five. Later the same day, my brother wrote "Sasori Death Gripped me in Wintergrasp today. *evil laugh*" That's how he got their names.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Mr. Turtle, or "Thank You, Husband!"

It's my birthday today and while I knew what husband was getting me (since he asked permission to buy it off our guild leader), I'm still pickled pink. Or is that tickled? I dunno, I just woke up.

Husband bought my long-desired Riding Turtle just a few days after my pretty bird dropped. I told him I was set for life but admitted I might be sorry later if we didn't get it while GL had one to sell.

Honestly? My desire for a turtle was inflicted upon me by those bumbly snuggly Kalu'ak. Who doesn't love them? Ever since I met their cuddlinesses, I've had the urge to ride around their camps with them, and now I can! ^_^

I'll admit, the Riding Turtle is one of the most impractical, frivolous mounts in the game. But it's also something I'll never regret getting. It's a classic fun item and a great toy for any kid-at-heart novelty enthusiast.


Thursday, November 5, 2009

Help Dying Kids, or "How to Keep Your Principles AND Help Others"

According to WoW Insider's poll, roughly a third of their readers will buy the pets, a third won't, and a third think it's the coming of the apocalypse.

I voted no simply because I don't pay real money unless a) I'm going to use the item regularly, b) I really really really really want it, or c) it comes with something else I want.

We're going to talk about option C right now. Beruthiel (whom I've decided I love) posted about how people should buy Pandaren Monks to help the Make-A-Wish Foundation because it's a terrific cause.

Farming Again, or "I Guess It's Okay"

I've clocked at least 18 hours farming the Hyacinth Macaw. My RL friend has been going at it on horde for about a month, and that worried me until husband noted that I've farmed more hours per day than she probably has -- he hasn't seen her on much except for raids.

On Moon Guard, I have a policy of skipping over land-bound mobs if lowbies are questing in the area, as well as bosses on ships.

One of the lowbies I passed was a cute human mage named Rynthia, memorable because I have a horde bank named Rinthea. I respected her space and left large swaths of mobs for her.

It was a trade-off. I got my self-respect, but I missed the little beauty she listed on the AH last night.

That's right. I placed an 8,000 gold bid on the macaw I could have gotten if I'd been a meaner person.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Pet Store, or "Paying Real Monies For Account-Bound Pets"

I said a while back I was glad Blizz hadn't pulled a Sims 3 on us and started selling tons of cosmetic items on their store to rake in the cash.

That statement was hasty.

They just announced 2 pets for the Blizzard store: Pandaren and Lil KT.

They're cheaper than TCG pets -- $10 each -- and unlike TCG pets, they act like collector's edition pets where they're given to all characters you have or ever will have. I paid $25 just for the BC:CE game code on ebay, so I'd say Blizz is making their pets cheaper than you'd get from resale. I also applaud the fact that they're not doing the "points" crap where you convert money into points and use points to buy things. They're very upfront about how much the pets cost, and while some players may have issues with the price or the ethics of selling pets, Blizz could be a lot more underhanded about the whole thing.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

PINK HEART ROCKET!, or "Omg Pink Heart Rocket!"

Okay, so mmo-champion updated with two new patch mounts.

One is the thing that'll probably be super-wicked-hard-to-get from Arthas or as a related achievement. Death-horse-thing, boys may now go wild with enthusiasm:

Yah yah, whatev, it's badass.

The AWESOME thing is the big love rocket, which is pink and has hearts on it! SQUEEEE!

Boubouille thinks the love rocket will be a rare Valentines drop. :D It's supposition, but he's almost always correct.

Both mounts "change depending on your Riding skill and location."

Squeedle squeedle flail flail!

While I realize I have my pretty bird on Dusty, if this is a rare Valentines drop, I will be farming it on every single one of my characters. Call it the principle of the thing, if you like, since I've posted in the official forums and suggested a pink mount before, bringing forth the cleverness of the forum trolls in all their glory.

But in reality, it's a
pink mount. Who wouldn't farm that to excess?

P.S. Post title changed from "Pink Love Rocket" because a friend has been to too many bachelorette parties and told me that's the name of a sex toy. *coughs uncomfortably* So yeah. Edited .

Goals, or "Let's Change the Subject, Shall We?"

I don't particularly like dwelling on unpleasant things, though I can't help it at times, so let's get on to a new, more upbeat topic: goals!

This is another one of those "I'm making a list here because I'd like to have it written down and you get to read it even though it's not that entertaining" things.


Before Patch 3.3
  • Hyacinth Macaw on Birdfall
Before Cataclysm
  • Proper gear on Birdfall and a Perky Pug.
  • Level alliance mage's enchanting until she can disenchant anything.
  • Farm hundreds of herbs, ore, enchanting mats, and cloth to sell to alts in Cat.
  • Finish all tedious old-world, BC, and Wrath things I've been putting off.
Long Term
  • Jeweled fishing pole on Dustfire.
  • Raven Lord for Birdfall.
  • Battlemaster for Plum.
  • All holiday achievements on Birdfall (not just violet proto drake).
  • 100 mounts on Birdfall.
  • Blue proto drake on Birdfall.
  • All in-game pets on Dustfire.
  • Finish Dustfire story.
Real Life
(Meh, why not.)
  • Get book published.
  • Buy a bed.
  • Adopt second kitty.

Unresolved, or "Bottling Things Up Eventually Goes Boom"

I wrote about the dangers of not talking things out, and I'm feeling the effects of a similar situation. Yeah, I'm PMSing, but every now and then I'm reminded of how pissed and hurt I was when I got backstabbed by my fellow officers (back when I was one), and even though it's been a year I still want to yell and scream and hurt someone. Not because of what happened, or even so much how it was handled --

I'm pissed that I never got a Sorry. That I just got "What's done is done" and "We did what we had to" and nobody ever stopped to think "I dunno, maybe she's upset for something real and isn't just being a hormonal bitch."

It kept coming back in flashes. And I kept repressing. And now it's out and I don't see how I can put it back or approach anyone from that travesty without insulting them.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Day of the Dead 2009, or "Skeletons in Hats Confuse Me"

Day of the Dead


Go to your home city or a neutral city. Find its graveyard. Find Catrina. Dance with her.

Buy the ingredients for Bread of the Dead: 1 simple flour from cooking vendor, 1 ice cold milk from an innkeeper. Buy recipe in the graveyard and cook it at the graveyard fire (requires graveyard fire specifically). Then buy an [Orange Marigold] from the graveyard vendor. Once you have the bread, use the marigold in the graveyard, look for the one spirit with a !, and accept/turn in the bread quest.

You will receive one fake pet (bag space item) and an achievement from this.

Epic Moments

I totally thought a guy in the costume didn't have real gear on in WSG and asked him to change.


If that wasn't dumb enough, it took me 2 more hours to realize we had a new holiday on hand.

And I almost missed it! Stupid Hyacinth Macaw farming. /grumble

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Fashion in the Cities, or "Pretty Princess Dress Up RP!"

I'd like to see roleplayers able to "enlist" in their city guard and get the appropriate title and gear.

Right now, only plate-wearers can have the full effect for most of these outfits, and several of the outfit pieces don't have great alternatives.

I included options for the few places where nothing quite fits, and highly recommend you look over weapons for your own favorites. Often, a simple white or grey item will serve just as well as the fancy stuff.

I scanned through hundreds, maybe thousands, of clothing items to find the best matches. If you want further alternatives, I can't remember any without re-scanning. Feel free to download WoW Model Viewer to do your own searches.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Novelty Policies, or "Nepotism or Good Sense?"

I read over the Azure Drake details (1.2% drop on Malygos 25) on Wowhead and came across the following comment that got voted down and heckled:
Droped for my guild last night.Rolls were limited to guild members of certain rank or above. I got really lucky and snagged this bad boy. This is by far the most sexy mount in my colection and dare I say in game...
People shouldn't have heckled until they found out what the rank was, honestly. It could be anything from "full member" to "veteran member" to "GM only." And each deserves different feedback. As for the fairness of guild policy -- as long as the policies are in writing, discriminated members can't complain when the roll goes the way it was designed. They had their chance to complain or gquit when they heard about it. If they don't like it when it happens, they're morons for being lazy and not fighting it sooner (or, OMG, even reading it).

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Wanted Tags, or "Can Has Fun?"

Emotes that might help alliance/horde relations:

/kos - "[Player] thinks you are kill on sight."
/warn - "[Player] issues you a warning."
/grin - (NEEDS FIX) - "[Player] grins at you."
/accident or /oops - "[Player] didn't mean to do that to you."
/safe or /noharm - "[Player] means you no harm."
/gather - "[Player] is gathering." / "[Player] thinks you are gathering."
/space - "[Player] gives you space."
/tsk - "[Player] shakes his/her head at you. Tsk tsk!"

Perhaps you could even add certain words to change an emote, like:

/polite - "[Player] makes polite motions at you."
  • /politespit - "[Player] politely spits."
  • /politenod - "[Player] politely nods."
/wicked - "[Player] feels wicked."
  • /wickedgrin - "[Player] grins wickedly."
  • /wickedspit - "[Player] spits wickedly."
/cute - "[Player] thinks you are being cute."
  • /cutespit - "[Player] spits cutely."
  • /cutecurtsey - "[Player] curtsies cutely."
  • /cutelisten - "[Player] listens cutely."

Onyxia 10, or "Did I Just Have . . . A GOOD TIME Raid Healing?!"

I have three 80s: a raid character (Dusty), a PVP character (Plum), and a character that stands around looking pretty (Birdy). They have their jobs and I try to stick to them.

I'm also spoiled. I admit it. I usually only do things with my brother and his wife, who've raid-healed over half of our guild's 10-mans for Wrath; my husband, who keeps his gear in sparkling shape; and my husband's best friend, who has 8 characters and reasonable raid gear on all of them (yay alt raids).

I also spent months pimping out my raid character's shadowy dps gear to get my pretty bird (yes, that's how to get me to care about gear), so she's now fit to enter and pwn any of the current raids. She even occasionally heals 5-mans (dual spec ftw!), but that's rare because I have the 2 best raid healers in the guild in my immediate family (I'm totally biased, but they really are very skilled and experienced).

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Nice to the Enemy, or "A Good Reputation is Worth Its Wait in Thorium"

I saved an alliance today. A level 44 in Un'goro was dying to a pterrordax and I saved him while farming thorium for Cataclysm.

My husband's best friend would say to kill them all, they deserve it, then shake his head at my live and let live philosophy. His thing is that he's a paladin and leveled up before that little OP spike in early Wrath, so he hates PVP as much as I do, except that he never survives a world fight and I sometimes do.

I've killed maybe 3 or 4 lowbies in my time, but for the most part I'll help them if they don't meet any of my auto-gank criteria.

The thing is, I want a good reputation. I told husband "I realize that they have horrible people, but they're not all bad, and I want to be the better person."

Now that I have pretty bird, I'm a little more visible on my server, a little more memorable, and I frankly don't want a rep as a huge ganking b-word.

So I try to be nice, because being a good person (and being seen as a good person) matters to me.

Just, you know . . . don't get between me and a rich thorium node.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Farming Multitask, or "How to Soften the Grind"

You have two great options.

If your system can handle it, watch a movie while you grind. Do this by going into your login screen, click "Options," and choose windowed mode. Squish your screen down and have the movie (or TV series) running below it on your screen. How big do the mobs have to be, honestly, for you to kill and loot?

If your system can't handle video+WoW, try some radio programs or audio books. Your local library is almost sure to have popular books on CD that you can check out (from Stephen King to Twilight) and my husband loves to listen to This American Life, which streams shows for free from their website. I personally have all of the Lake Wobegon discs on my Amazon wishlist because Garrison Keillor cracks me up.

The only drawback is you can't watch anything subtitled.

My Current Faves:
Stuff I have to wait and watch with husband:
  • Everything else.

Monday, October 26, 2009

WoW Financial, or "How WoW Economy Can Apply to Life"

I'm always amused by the irony that despite how much I hate math and how much my husband loves math, I'm the household financial guru.

I've been listening to financial guy Dave Ramsey, who offers strategies to "be a millionaire by retirement" in completely legal and tidy ways, and what he says about real world money can easily be applied to Warcraft money. (I'm less interested in riches and more interested in stability, but what the hell. I've always wanted to be rich so I can give to charities. Is that weird?)

The big super-secret financial tip? Work hard and don't do anything stupid.

He says it's not hard but you need to educate yourself on money just like anything else in life. Throwing your money around with no clue what you're doing is the easiest way to lose it.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

New LFG, or "Does This Bode Well?"

One of the reasons my friends don't pug on Zuluhed is that the pugging climate is terrible. Anyone worth pugging with has a guild and doesn't need to pug, and the people who want to pug are mostly the server ninjas.

The next patch gives us a new Looking for Group interface, where you queue with people from other servers in a massive pool of pugging.

No waiting, no mess.

Quite a few of the comments on the WoW Insider post were "Can't we limit the pug to our own server?" Which defeats the purpose, I think. You could just ask in general and trade for that. (Of course, everyone will be pugging with this system, so... yeah.)

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Achieve This, or "Flaws of the System"

My brother is planning to switch his class again in the next expansion pack. He had a warlock in BC, a paladin in Wrath, and he's thinking druid for Cataclysm. It's not his altaholism or even the desire to try something new.

It's simply that he hasn't found his perfect fit yet.

Today, discussing his move to druid, he said "I hate losing my progress and achievements."

I got to talking with husband about it and discovered that the achievement system is, in fact, flawed. Achievements were my big reason for Blizz to add race changes, but what if it isn't your race that's the problem? What if it's your class?

Far from suggesting paid class changes, I think we need to take a look at the way the achievement system works for (and detracts from) people who want to change their main.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Hallow's End 2009, or "Trick or Treat is Awfully Sweet"

Peruse Hallow's End 2008 for more concise quest and achievement listings.

First things first:
  • Grab a pug for the level 80 boss in Scarlet Monastery for his kill achievement (75+ can have summons). You'll have more success getting a pug these first two or three days from a major city.
  • Every hour, trick or treat at an innkeeper for the bag of super-goodies.

Pets DO Fly, or "That Guy Was Right"

One of my commenters was all "Flying pets fly now" and I was like "No way" but I forgot to check.

Then I flew off something high and my phoenix hatchling followed.


Hey, look, proof.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

DND, or "Chatting With The Fam"

Non-Gamers' Guide to This Post

If you type "/dnd" it puts you on "Do Not Disturb" for anyone who whispers you.

You can add details to the DND if you wish, like "/dnd Eating" or "/dnd Moo" which will show up as "[Character] does not wish to be disturbed: Moo"


I have a policy:
Never ever ever ever ever do anything during PMS week.
I broke this policy last week. My brother ran an impromptu VOA, then we went to TOC and I had fun there even though I don't love the place.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Mr. Chilly, or "Hey, Wait, Wut?"

Um... I guess it's a deal (yep). If you have a merged WoW/ account, from today to Nov 11, you get a Mr. Chilly. He looks just like the Kalu'ak penguin, except with blue eyes instead of red.

He's also Account Bound, so you can send him around (though all your characters get him in the mail.)

I got during the first "get a pet for doing this" promotion, and I haven't regretted it. I read about some bugs when it first came out, but I've never had a problem with it.

Cute penguin! Wheeee!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Slow Times Are Slow

For those who haven't been reading, I just moved and thus have RL. And Disney channel (very distracting)! Also farming a Hyacinth Macaw.

And I have to get back to my "real" writing so I can pay off my student loans.

All of this makes for a slow blog period.

I'm neither taking a hiatus nor intentionally being slow. There just hasn't been anything exciting happening beyond farming pets and cleaning our new kitchen. I'm sure I'll have more frustrated PVP stories soon, though. :D

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Speculation, or "Worgen & Goblin for Novelty Players"

Folks have talked about the lore and the racials and the designs -- but what about the fun pointless stuff? The stuff we noticed first about our own characters when we started this game?

The dances.

The flirts.

The pets.

Every race has personalized pets, mounts, and emotes. We have semi-solid knowledge about the mounts we'll see -- but not so much about the rest.

Friday, October 9, 2009

The Grind, or "Getting Something for Effort"

I've mentioned before, I don't mind dying constantly in battlegrounds. Dying is part of the day-to-day if you're going to PVP (I like PVP when I choose to PVP, as opposed to someone else choosing it for me).

So I have two grinds I'm trying to consolidate: hyacinth macaw (1 in 5,000 droprate) and PVP mounts (150 WSG/AB/AV marks). I'm up to 19 WSG marks and about 600 tries for the macaw.

Consolidation, or "The Perks and Drags of Bringing Home Birdie"

I don't have to make this decision right away, but it's definitely a thought: Should I transfer my alliance characters to Zuluhed?

Monday, October 5, 2009

Pet Super Collector, or "New Achievement? Unknown Reward"

So I'm at my brother's, waiting for our possessions to arrive in town, and catching up on the news I missed over at the best two sites ever, and it seems that MMO Champion has mined up a Special Vanity Pets achievement. No known reward, but considering the insane difficulty of these suckers, Sateena at WarcraftPets is hoping this might be the one to give us our long-awaited baby murloc.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Gathering for Cataclysm, or "Everyone Likes Gold"

New races means new rerolls means new characters leveling professions means high demand for profession-leveling materials.

So whether you're a miner, herbalist, or just willing to put in the time for grinding cloth, I suggest you stock up to help those power-levelers level their crafts -- and line your pockets.

This post brought to you by the "I don't have internet access on the road" post scheduling system.

Friday, September 25, 2009

For the Horde, or "See Mom? Warcraft Has Real World Benefits"

We're finishing the last details of moving (will be MIA all next week) and husband just confirmed our new apartment and scheduled the cable guy.

Afterward, husband came into the living room and pumped his fist in the air. "Say it with me now. For the Horde!"

I pumped my fist in a confused manner. "For the Horde..?"

He'd chatted with the cable installation guy, who'd noticed we'd chosen the super-fast option. Installation guy said "Yeah, I use that too. It's really great for gaming." Husband agreed and mentioned that we play Warcraft.

Installation guy was pleased. "So do I! Now, I have to ask... Alliance or Horde?"

"Horde," said husband.

"Good, because now I can comp you for the $50 installation fee."

For the Horde, indeed. XD

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Rock the Boat, or "The Way Things Have Been Done"

The biggest drawback for me and my character customization fetish is that my MMO characters can't hang out together. And it made me wonder -- why do MMOs insist you can only play one character at a time?

Customization Nation, or "Where Avatars Can Be All That They Can Be"


A while back, I went afk for Sims 3 and one of my readers requested my take on the game. Here, I'm going to take a broader view of that request and talk about avatar customization in games in general.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

A E I O U, or "Brewfest Grammar Police"

Me: Is anyone else disturbed by that murderer of the English language? ...hic!
Brother: what are you referring to?
Guildie: no ur just drunk
Me: Guild name "Trolling Is A Art."
Brother: is he... a troll?
Me: Yes. But he used "a" instead of "an." He's a monster!
Brother: Sorry... is he AN troll?
Me: Hiss.
Brother: Their their, Beth, it's okay.
Me: /CRY

I don't mind internet shorthand, don't get me wrong. I correct people when they misspell stuff, but I don't insist everyone type stuff out in properly-formed sentences.

But such a blatant grammatical mistake in your own guild name?

/flails of horror

Help Me, or "The Low and the Desperate"

Request from a Level 52 to a Level 80
"can u help me?"
"what do you need?"
"well i need hhelp trying to get a mount the. foollow me"

Request from a Level 48 to a Level 80
"okay umm can you by any chance help me do that ill pay you every gold i have it should b 6 gold"

These are so sad they're almost not funny.

Approaching a stranger for something is like going to a job interview. You have to make them want to help you. There has to be something in it for the person helping, and you have to communicate clearly and make sure people know what's going on.

When Mr. 52 whispered me with a request for anything from the ram reins to run the Brewfest quest to the Zulian Tiger in Stranglethorn Vale, my reaction was an automatic "hell no" (okay, I said a little more than that and quite a bit more politely, but that was my first instinct).

Let's say he wanted the Direbrew mount, since that's what it probably was (plenty of people don't realize you no longer need the mount as a drop to get Brewmaster).

First, I want the ram on my druid so there's a stranger rolling against me. Second, he's 52 and doesn't have a summon so our summons would be limited. Third, he's 52 and can't help fight so he's dead weight. Fourth, he's a stranger so why would I waste my precious once-a-day summon on him when my guildmates want it?

How could he have phrased it to make me help him?
  • He (or a friend of his) has a summon.
  • I don't have to use my summon.
  • He lets me roll against him if something cool drops.
That's the only way I'd help a complete stranger. The only way.

Let's look at Mr. Level 48. He asked a guildie for help killing Direbrew and offered to pay. I'm more sympathetic to his case, but he still has the same major roadblock that Mr. 52 had -- no summon to offer.

How could he have phrased it to make her help him?
  • He'll pass on everything, just wants the kill.
  • He brings his own summon (self or friend).
  • She doesn't have to use her summon.
You don't have a lot of bargaining room when you're low level wanting to do high level things. You make cuts and sacrifices and, if those don't work, you keep leveling until you have enough to trade with.

When you don't get to join the big kids, suck it up and do the low level stuff for now. Brewfest will be back again next year when you're 80.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Dance Studio News, or "I Was Hoping for Video, But This Works"

MMO Champion says:
... if I had to draw conclusions based on what we have in the game files, I'd say that the Dance Studio will let players create custom dances by combining different moves, effects, and modifiers. Once they are happy with their dance, it looks like they will be able to name it and share it with other players (it would explain the dancecache.wdb to store them clientside). The PlayDance("dance name") command most likely means that players will be able to save multiple dances on a character and pick one depending on their mood.

SHARED DANCES! (Most likely.)


This poses a new social issue. If you can share dances and you spend hours designing a perfect dance just for your character and some level 12 shows up and says "I CAN HAS DANCE?!" -- what do you do?

Say it with me: "L2Create, Nub."

I think it could be like a bit like gold begging -- people who didn't grind all that gold out on their own don't see the big deal of asking for a handout. And people who don't have the energy or creativity to make their own dances will likely ask to use other people's, if sharing is allowed.

I suggest that (as long as it isn't super-expensive per dance) everyone make a dance that you're willing to hand out to others, but you keep your favorite for yourself. There's no shame in not giving away your hard work, as long as you're polite about it: "Sorry, I made this specifically for this character and don't plan to share it. I do have another dance I can share, though."

That gives them a chance to use your other dance (and see you as a generous person) or be a whiny jerky brat and keep demanding the one they asked for (we've all seen it with gold beggars).

Luckily, whiny jerky brats aren't our problem and give us a chance to exercise our Ignore list! :D

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Brewfest 2009, or "WHY Did I Choose to Miss the Second Half by Moving?"

Lesson for all you little WoWers -- check the in-game schedule before setting the date for a three day drive with all your stuff to a new location. Otherwise, you'll end up moving in the middle of Brewfest.

Changes since Brewfest 2007 & 2008
  • Direbrew is 80 with 80 drops.
  • No longer need a mount drop for the meta achievement.
  • No longer need to drink 12 months of brews for the meta achievement.

Major Dailies/Quests That Give Tokens

First day gave me 125 tokens from doing all the available quests.

Dark Iron Invasion
There's a mini-quest you do where you pick up mugs off the table, drink, and chuck them (auto-targeting included). Dark Irons pop up every half hour or so and you find a table by one of the brew tents, drink, and chuck. A barker will refill you, so basically if you put the mugs on a hotkey you get to just spam it for 5 minutes.

The goal is to protect 1 out of your 3 kegs of Brewfest beer. If you make the enemy retreat (denoted by a /yell to retreat and number of losses), a gear will appear in the center of the grounds with a daily quest. (You don't have to help to get this.) Pick it up, turn it in.

Direbrew's Dire Brew (One-Time Only)
Kill him, loot quest item for 40 tokens. He's 80 with 80 loot and still has 2 rare drop mounts.

Do this in the first three days if you don't have a group of friends or guildies to do it with. I'm not even joking, it's the easiest time of the holiday to PuG it.

Check to make sure everyone in your party has a summon. This includes you. Just walking in does not equal a summon.

Prereq for Direbrew summon: Do the Welcome quest that gives you a reward of your choice of drink (available under the main banner leading onto the grounds). After that, head to Kharanos (A) or the road south of Org (H) to pick up Save Brewfest!

The rest is inside with Direbrew. Turn in, talk to Direbrew, he attacks.

Be prepared to meet him, because even if you don't kill him your summon is gone for the day.

Bark for _____
They give you a ram and you run around your city to the four flags. Read this quest before doing it if you aren't familiar with it. Alliance flags here-ish, horde flags here.

You no longer have to get back to the guy before your ram runs out, you can dismount once you're finished and ride back on your own.

Tips for Riding: Keep the ram's speed on yellow and put it down to bluegreen when you get your fatigue to 70. If you hit 100 fatigue, it will make you go super-slow.

There and Back Again
Keg deliveries have a limit of 3 and 10 token reward for the first. AFTER that, you can speak to the guy once a day, click through his dialogue, and turn in kegs for 2 tokens each until your ram timer runs out.

Tips for Riding: Whip your mount into a lather and keep it in the red riding speed. Brush by buckets of apples (more convenient placement this year, thank God) to remove fatigue, since hitting 100 reduces your mount to a crawl.

Pink Elephants (One-Time Only)
Go to the major cities. Bring drinks or your stein to use at the kegs. Get drunk. Use quest item on pink elephants:


Coming soon...

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Pirate's Day, or "She's On The Bank Roof"

Go up in the inn, out toward Seahorn and the Baron, loop left past the horde flightmaster, continue to the bank roof.

Talk to Dread Captain DeMeza.


(Achievement available today only, no substitutes. Arrrr.)

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Hugs for Revenge, or "Opportunities Arise"

So yesterday I wrote about a ganking hunter who messed with us (most likely) because he hated me for my mount.

Today I found him in the Hodir dailies hub and squashed him (he went down pretty fast).

Yes, that's an AFK. Please, like I could take him one-on-one? I know how squishy I am.

And, yes, I got an achievement off him. I don't PVP on Dusty (I have another character for that) and never bothered to do PVP achievements for her, but this seemed right somehow.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Cost, or "Drawbacks to Owning Something Cool"

  • The ribbons fly in my face when I turn the camera (due to my settings).
  • I'm hesitant to mount in front of large groups when I'm busy.
  • Mounting in front of my friends feels a bit like bragging.
  • I shift out of shadowform every time I mount, so I never have mana.
  • I get focus-fired by gankers.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Where You Belong, or "Husband Makes Me Laugh"

Three weeks ago, I decided it was time for a gear audit. We were trying to down Kael'thas and the ranged woman wasn't going down fast enough with just me on her, so I decided to do something about it.

Those of you who've been reading for a while know that my husband and I compliment each other with our WoW styles. He's into learning about his characters, what they can do, and all the spells and gear and glyphs and enchants available to them.

I'm into looking pretty.

So he tells me how to gear my character and I help him with his color coordination.

Sometimes my lack of interest in getting new gear can verge into the silly. When I asked him to help me on my gear audit and gave him a list of my squirreled-away currency (honor, badges, etc), he found me about 3 major buyable upgrades and we had the following conversation:

[Husband stirring coffee in the kitchen and informing me of upgrades while I lean against the doorway. He's already bemoaned my lack of purchasing skills and has just told me which legs to buy.]

Him: You also have enough Emblems of Valor you've been sitting on for a month that will give a cloak upgrade.

Me: Go me!

Yes. Go. Go to Fail Land. Because that's where you belong.

[At this point, I was too busy laughing to finish the conversation, so he sent me an email with the rest of my upgrades.]

Monday, September 14, 2009

Selfless, or "Can I Come With You To Kael'thas?"

While hovering on my phoenix in a public spot today, I got a lot of whispers, a few of which got excited when I mentioned my friends would probably go back to TK for more phoenixes. One asked if he could come with us, and I said I'd pass his name to my friends (I will and they'll say no). Another seemed like he wanted to ask to be included, but I "had to" log to get lunch.

Why would they want to be part of my group instead of forming their own? Because the hardest part of the phoenix farming isn't the fight itself, and it isn't the gear. It is finding others willing to go when the possibility of reward grows exponentially smaller with each group member. (And also because letting someone else do all the work is nice.)

My group was unique in several ways, the biggest being that my guildmates went in knowing they wouldn't get anything out of it besides a TK achievement -- they went in specifically to get me the first phoenix.

Competitive groups will have to weigh the pro of possibly winning a phoenix mount vs the con of probably grinding for an epic amount of time just to see the roll go to someone else (and perhaps see that person leave the farming group so that you have to find someone to fill their spot -- and thus keep the odds of winning it very low).

So why has my guild been successful, and why are we likely to see another phoenix eventually?

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Kael'thas Strat, or "How To Farm Your Phoenixes"

Where: The Eye of Tempest Keep (Netherstorm, Outlands)
What: Kael'thas Sunstrider, 2% Drop Rate for Ashes of Al'ar
When: Once a Week

You can skip all the other bosses and go straight to him. The trash is annoying and dangerous, with knockbacks and whirlwinds, but you can handle it if you can handle the boss.

Recommended Level 80 Team Requirements:
  • 3 Melee
  • 2 Heals
  • 1 Ranged
  • 1 Tank
^ This requirement list is for level 80 if your gear is post-Ulduar and pre-Icecrown. If it's below Uld, get one more of everything.

When starting out at 85, I recommend using 5-7 players. You shouldn't try with less than 5 because of mind control (he controls 3 players at a time, and your teammates will try to kill you) and the fact that mind control won't break until a non-mind-controlled player breaks it.  Using 4 players is theoretically possible, but I imagine more complications.

Phoenix Mount, or "OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG"

A friend recorded the whole fight, and I'll get you a link when he has it available. (Here's a link of me flying.)

This was our third run. Third. I'm absurdly lucky and don't deserve it, but I needed a pick-me-up after lunch today. We went out with a family I really like and my only female friend in town, and I started sniffling about moving away (2.5 weeks, and then we'll live by my brother and his wife).

So then we got home and ran TK and... um... it dropped.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Draenic Wildstaff, or "It Grows Flowers!"

What to Wear

WoW Insider has their little "Ooo, look at this piece of gear" thing, except they pay too much attention to stats and not enough to pretty.

Seriously, though, I've been wanting to feature potential role-playing gear for a while, I just never got uber-passionate about the more common options. So every now and then, when I find something interesting, I'll tell you where you can get it. :)


Dropped By:
Avatar of the Martyred
Instance: Auchenai Crypts (Auchindoun)
Description: It's animated! The flowers bloom and change into mushrooms.

You can see this same staff in Dragonblight's Emerald Dragonshrine on Nishera the Garden Keeper, Fhyron Shadesong at the Argent Tournament, and Netherstorm's Aurine Moonblaze at the elevator to Stormspire. It matches an epic hunter bow. Nishera is shown in the video below.

Friday, September 11, 2009

That Time of Year, or "Is Half Your Guild Taking a Hiatus?"

School is starting. We're in between content patches. The next expansion got announced. Several exciting new games are coming out.

It's a rough time. It was slow before Wrath, it was slow before Burning Crusade. It should get even slower than it is now in the two or three months before Cataclysm.

Raiding guilds with spots to fill will start trying to poach; players who can't get their raid fix in more casual raid guilds will leave to try the major leagues; and guild leaders will be thrown into a tailspin.

Don't panic.

Everything will be okay.

To help your guild survive, break out your towels and hold them tight. Then consider the following list:
  • PUG the raid spots you can't fill. If your raiders are raiding with you, they aren't raiding with strangers.
  • Encourage Real Lifers to return. Whether leaving for school or another game, let them know they have a spot when they come back.
  • Schedule runs and events for any old world achievements people haven't completed yet. This will help entertain the bored.
  • Schedule social events and contests, like hide and seek or screenshot competitions. Make sure the prizes are tempting.
  • Help people. Unstable times are the times you need to go out of your way to make sure everyone feels welcome. Don't kill yourself trying to do everything, but do take the time to help with Chillmaw when no one else will, or dps an instance when they're begging to fill one final slot, or just chat with someone while you do your separate things.
Members of guilds, consider:
  • Don't bite the hand that feeds you. Letting yourself get poached is a bad idea. Not only does it tick off your old guild, your new guild may well put you aside when their real members get active again. Think about it. You are their second-string, their desperate move. Why would they want to keep you happy once they aren't in trouble? Loyalty breeds loyalty. You stay when times are rough, your guild trusts and values you that much more.
  • It will get better. A slump is just that -- a slump. It's not a sign that your guild is dying. Everyone slumps.
  • Share your ideas and needs. If you really desperately want X or Y (and it's possible), talk to other people and try to generate enthusiasm. The people you especially want to convince are the ones who always end up leading group events -- these people know how to plan, organize, and get things done. Events led by them always inspire interest and confidence.
  • Encourage the ideas and needs of others. Particularly those that coincide in some way with your needs, but sometimes you can work out a compromise where you help someone and they'll help you back. It's win-win.
Related articles include How To Form A Group and Understanding Needs vs Wants.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Server Crash, or "What Sucks Here?"

So my family and I were about to win a Wintergrasp (thank you, thank you, hold your applause) when people noticed they couldn't resurrect.

I figured my healing skillz were needed more than ever, since death had become a permanent state and we only had one more minute to defend the fortress, so I put my back into the effort until we won and the timer reset.

But nobody got marks.

And nobody got quest credit.

Not even the living.

So I sat and watched the angry raid chat until the server crashed and logged us all out.

"They don't care that servers are going down, they just want our money."

I really wanted to argue but kept my mouth shut. The rational truth is that if people can't play, Blizzard will lose customers, thus the guy's perspective has a whopping inconsistency issue.

It's true Blizz is a business, but I've never, in the few years I've been playing this game, gotten the impression the company doesn't care about its quality of service. Players might argue about whether or not what they produce is worth the time and effort, but it is false to say they don't put time and effort into their product.

I also swear to you, as the wife of an IT guy, when something goes down unexpectedly the company scrambles to fix it. They are not just sitting there going "Oh, we'll take care of those servers after we have a snack break." When one of my husband's sites goes down, it doesn't matter if he's watching The Office with me and I'm on an emo hormone binge -- he has to work. So I'm sure the guys sweating away at Blizz, fixing server crashes for ungrateful little snots when they could be watching The Office, really appreciate all the whiny jerks spouting off.

"I swear to God, I'm quitting for Aion."

Yeah, um. Having a bug in the game you're playing is not a good reason to switch to a new game. Brand new games actually have (gasp!) more bugs than well-established games.

Nor does this work as a scare tactic. Nobody actually cares that one disgruntled player is waving around Aion like a flag of war. You want to play it, play it, but stop going on about how you should because Blizz is so fail. If you had the rocks to quit, you would have done it already.


I realize people need to vent when they get frustrated, but I also think some of those guys need anger management. It might be important to get what you earn, but missing out on three Wintergrasp marks is not world-ending. This goes for pretty much any aspect of the game, because some things stick with you longer than success or rewards or even the game itself. Like friends. People who help you -- not because they can get something off of you, but because you have mutual affection and respect for each other.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Dusty Goes Aion, or "My Friend Let Me Take 100 Screenshots"

So a few of my guildmates have gone to Aion and one of them (the guy who met Felicia Day at Blizzcon) let me and husband pop over so I could make a character or three (okay, I just had time for one) on his computer and take a billion (okay, just 60) screenshots of her.

I have no real desire to play Aion, but I do like character customization (a little too much -- that's why I have a Sims obsession). So here's my remake of Dustfire for Aion! :D

I'll have you know, though, that all my screenshots weren't of Dustfire. I had my friend take a good three of his cute freckled scout! So there.

And here's another guildmate's adorable character:


I . . . um . . . really just like cute photos. XD

Friday, September 4, 2009

Healing in PVP, or "I Like Healing Unkillable People"

I healed in arenas for a bit. The other team identifies you and you get a HoT or two off before they kill you.

I quit arenas pretty soon after we started (it was the waiting for our games to pop as much as the games themselves) and started healing battlegrounds.

Which is the funnest thing ever.

My favorite part is that you can stay in the back and if your dps is good enough, they'll keep the other team so busy trying to survive, they won't even notice you.

I went to a WSG with a prot warrior friend who tanks raids for our guild, and we more or less two-manned that game. Our team kept them a bit busy, but he ran the flag and I healed the 5% of health he lost every now and then, and we were unstoppable.

I went into an Eye of the Storm this morning and had two really great unstoppable dps that I just followed around healing. They could not die even with five people on them, as long as I kept something coming.

I used bg chat to roll around in the happy a moment: "I like healing unkillable people."

Another person replied: "You should heal us killable people too." (Paraphrased from the gibberish it actually was.)

It bummed me a bit, because I had been. I heal anyone in my range who needs it, regardless of gear or level.

Things I've learned from healing battlegrounds:
  • Grid is as amazing as everyone says it is.
  • People like to leave healers on defense alone, where they can't heal anyone and can't defend anything.
  • Going in with at least 1 dps who will make an effort to stay near you can win you the game.
  • It can be therapeutic to yell "Don't you hurt my honey!" in Vent while you heal your injured spouse to full.
  • If you accept a bg invite while in an instance, it ports you to the nearest graveyard when you get out.
  • If you're traveling in flight form when you enter, you'll still be in the air when you get out -- but you won't be in flight form.
  • Certain times of day are better than others.
  • A healer in the right place at the right time can turn the tide of a battle.
  • Some things, you can't outheal. Like stupid. Or their entire team.
  • When you are trying to outheal another healer, and you're evenly matched, the one who wins is the one whose dps realizes they shouldn't be attacking the other dps. They should be attacking the healer.
  • Defense is boring. Winning is fun.
  • Rotating defensive positions between several people keeps individuals from rebelling and leaving something completely undefended.
  • Getting PUGs to coordinate is painful. Getting a premade to coordinate is delightful.
  • Playing defense can be fun with a friend.
  • The more you can be aware of what everyone is doing around you, the smarter your play will be.
  • Stealthers can retake or defend positions more cleverly than anyone else.
  • Taking the time to open and study your map in an unfamiliar battleground is better than following others with no clue where you are or where you should be.
  • One healer is good. Two is great. But a team of only healers loses.
  • Staying in stealth until people need heals makes me giggle.
And so on and so forth.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Your Rights, or "GMs Are Here to Serve YOU"

First of all, I will acknowledge that there are some GMs who do not understand your rights as I list them here. These are the GMs who did not pay attention in GM school. Most of them should do their job the right way the first time, but if you get a rare dense one, just explain things to them the way I've explained them to you and cross your fingers.

1) You have the right to play unmolested.

Verbal harassment is prohibited on all servers. RP servers have a special rule about "not harassing the RP players." PVP servers are the only ones that allow physical harassment, as it's considered a facet of PVP, but if someone is killing you over and over or dragging mobs onto you (aka camping and griefing) on a PVE server, your player rights are being violated.

2) You have the right to click on stuff.

I'm not talking about the zerg on the quest giver after a WG. I'm talking about that one guy on the mammoth who stays on the quest giver for ten minutes while taunting you, or who stands on the mailbox or even a street vendor and actively refuses to move in order to hamper your gameplay.

3) You have the right to police your server.

From name violations to behavior issues, you are the police force of your server. GMs take care of several servers at a time and don't know or care what's going on in your immediate vicinity. They only care when you ticket them to enforce your rights as a citizen of Azeroth (and paying customer). (This right does not extend to bossing people around or trying to enforce your rights on your own.)

4) You have the right to play without player-caused lag.

If there's a team of twenty mages spamming their aoe's in a city full of people, and you can only move five millimeters every five seconds, that is a compromise of your rights as a player. This right is to avoid intentional lag caused by other players, not the lag caused by the ordinary crush in cities.

5) You have the right for a fair game.

The guy who gets across Warsong Gulch in two seconds due to a map bug? Yeah, he's cheating. GMs take cheating more seriously than anything else, though the correct term is "exploiting."

6) You have the right to avoid advertising and scams.

Those "Buy Gold" people in the cities named Xfrwtyfasfg? They're not supposed to be there. Nor are the people whispering you with misspelled offers of a spectral tiger raffle. Blizz does what it can about these people, but they keep finding work-arounds to get back in.

7) You have the right not to be offended.

If someone has a name, guild name, pet name, or comment that is racist, sexist, hate, or otherwise super-offensive, you have the right to report it. Mania had a great idea I wish I'd thought of in my last reporting post: if you're reporting a name, put the person on your friends list and make sure it changes to something non-offensive. (GMs do not check back to make sure the new name is good, though some will rename a player themselves.) This way, you can keep reporting them if they keep picking bad names.

8) You have the right to report infractions of your rights.

To start a ticket with a GM, click the red question mark at the bottom of your screen and click the appropriate section. In the given field, you should put a succinct description of the infraction and guilty party.

Try to include all of the following in your ticket:
  1. Offender: Name, Race, Class, Level. If there are any "special" letters, point those out specifically.
  2. Time: The exact time the infraction took place.
  3. Location: Where did the infraction take place?
  4. Channel: Which chat channel did the infraction take place in, if at all? (Whispers, say, yell, general, trade, etc?)
  5. Infraction: What exactly did they do wrong? Give exact words, spells cast, or mount as it affected the situation.
If you have to log off before a GM can respond to you, they will still look into your ticket, so you want it to be as thorough as possible.

For long-term situations, try to be as exact as you can for each incident -- the farther back GMs have to wade, the harder it will be for them to find the incidents you mention, and they have other tickets besides yours to take care of.

Screenshots (PrintScrn) don't hurt, either.

9) You have the right to privacy.

This means that if you have a ticket opened against you for something you did, the GM won't air your dirty laundry to the people who reported you. The reporter does not get to find out what happened as a result of his or her ticket.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Hi!, or "Open Letter To Zuluhed Alliance"

If I see you around and you're way lower than me, and I kill you, it's because I hate your guild. Switching tags will fix this.

If you think your level 22 bow and arrow can put a single dent in my armor's durability, please feel free to shoot me with it. But I reserve the right to return the favor.

I'll buy your Argent Tournament pets for 1,000g on the neutral AH. Anything much over that is ridiculous. (My friends need them too, so feel free to keep listing.)

I realize that members of my fellow horde can be massive jerks and that even some of my friends like to mess with you. I don't. I will leave you alone if you'll leave me alone.

I have friends. If you insist on making trouble in daily zones or even lowbie zones where someone's girlfriend is questing, depending on how many people are on, our guild will enjoy PVP all over your corpse.

If someone attacks you and you're fighting back for your life, and I come along and help your foe, I'm sorry. I have to default assume you attacked first and protect myself from being attacked second.

We hate some horde as much as you hate them. Please feel free to gank any of our trolls from the official forums, such as unrepentant ninjas like Billpaxton. If you have an Alliance hitlist you'd like us to look at, I'll pass it to my guild.

I hate world PVP. This does not mean I'm a pacifist. If I can't defend myself, I'll call friends or log off. If I can, I'll wear your entrails as a hat for an hour.

A /smile when you could have ganked me will make me put you on my nicelist. This doesn't stop my PVP-happy friends from bothering you, but it does mean I'll yell at them for it.

I understand PVP when there's a mining node, awesome herb, or rare mob that we're vying over. I won't hold this against you and expect the same consideration.

Vying for stuff does not extend to fishing pools for me. L2Share.

Ganking me does not actually ruin my day. It just means I switch to Sims 3 for a while and play with cute hairstyles.

If my friends hurt you (or keep sheeping you and giggling), sorry. I swear they're actually really nice.

If you show me your pets, I'll show you mine. Same goes for dresses if we're near a bank.

If you're a rare race/gender/class combo and I need you for the holidays, and I end up /hugging you about 40 times when I find you, I'll remember you fondly forever. (Thinking of you, Manna, sweetie.)

If you have a name like Xxlegolassxx, I won't regret seeing you dead. I just won't.

If you and your friends are hanging out and I have to get past, I may drop in and fear you all. This is merely a defensive maneuver and won't hurt you, so please don't death grip me back.

I'm a cute and harmless girl. I'll make adorable sadfaces if you hurt me.

In Vino Veritas