But Blizzard knew.
Zarhym gives us the extra information I needed in order to decide if I liked the "Get your holiday bosses through LFG!" change. And I do. I like it, because I don't have to roll against crappy people anymore or nag friends into bringing 100 alts.
You now get mounts from loot "troves" that are available per player per day when you kill the boss. You can queue as many times as you like, but you only get the trove for the first kill per day.
You still get normal loot from the boss itself, but the mounts will now drop per player "trove."
This solution is identical to getting Occulus in random LFG and having it drop a bag that can hold a mount, except you can get random Occulus more than once a day and you can't do the same with the holiday boss.
Since my issues were that I didn't have friends to take me to the boss, nor the will to force them to bring their alts to summon for me, and I didn't see the point of rolling against 4 other greedy people if a mount did drop, and I didn't want to spend all day every day for a week or more killing myself on the grind even if I did have the necessary resources, this solution fixes every single issue I had without upping the mount drop rate.
Normal people are back in the running!
Sure, those of us who want to help our friends can't bring tons of alts to give them extra chances anymore, but Zarhym said that "grandfathering alts" was never intended in the first place. He also points out that this removes any chance of people scamming others by not having a summon.
For me, being slightly (or even massively) inconvenienced alt-wise is worth kicking the legs out from under crappy people. You may not agree, if you've been alt-grinding the bosses every chance you get, but I remain firm on this. Any policy that stops jerks dead in their tracks makes me grin.