Friday, April 18, 2008

Family Camping Trip, or "We Are Like Ants At Your Picnic"

Dramatization, Sort Of

Dustfire: Yay, I'm killing nagas and getting quest drops!
Nesme (Human Warrior): I have season 3 gear and a 2000+ 3v3 team rating! You do not get to kill this naga!
Dustfire: I am mortally wounded!
Nesme: Hahaha! I can kill cloth-wearers in worse pvp gear than me!
Dustfire: I shall sneak away and heal myself, then return while he is at a disadvantage! [CHARGE!] Oh, I am mortally wounded again!
Equilibrio (Druid Family-In-Law): I shall come heal you! I have great mana!
Dustfire: I cannot find him again. [bites lip] Well, let's quest.
Equilibrio: Why are you not getting hurt?! Give me something to do! [Gets hit] Found him! [heals] He has a friend! We shall kill her too.
Dustfire: Ha! Take that, vile healer! Take that, poo-face warrior! We are victorious! I spit on the ground where lie your broken bodies! BWAHAHAHA!
Equilibrio: Oop, here they are again. Let's kill!
Dustfire: Killing with massive JOY! [dies]
Equilibrio: [dies] A vile hunter came and saved them.
Shenoah: I am brave and true and love my wife! I shall aid you!
Dustfire: I love you! Thank you for helping me! [smooch smooch smooch smooch smooch]
Equilibrio: I'm going to be sick. >_>
Azuel (Friend Warlock): You are brave, my friends! Do you desire another ally to wreak havoc on these upstart alliance and protect the innocent questers of Azeroth?
Dustfire: [stops smooching husband] Yes, thank you! Teehee!
Equilibrio: I'm a bear! ROAR! Someone get hurt so I can heal. Hey, you random people, come here and let me heal and buff you.
Random People: Hurray! Long live Equilibrio!
Shenoah: They've rezzed! Let us destroy them with impunity for daring to mess with one of our women!
[Massacre of Nesme and Lul-something, who are on the same pooooowerful 3v3 team. Other alliance run by. Occasionally, we help them kill their nagas.]
Dustfire: Let us sit here for a long long time!
Dredskies: [rides up, sits 12 times on Nesme's corpse, then leaves, having said nothing]
Dustfire: [half an hour later -- bored] Let us move ahead and hope they assume we've left.
[In five minutes, Nesme tries to ride by on his pretty orange kitty.]
Shenoah: Frostshock! War Stomp!
Azuel: Curse!
Equilibrio: Moonfire!
Dustfire: Death!
[Great rejoicing and laughter. Ten minutes after that, Lul-something tries to ride by.]
Shenoah: Here! Destroy her!
Lul-something: /rofl /rofl /rofl /rofl
Dustfire: We are victorious!
Shenoah: Lul's body has disappeared. The coward runs! [takes Dustfire's hand] You are vindicated, dear wife.
Dustfire: My HERO!
Equilibrio & Azuel: We helped. >_>


I like to think that Nesme and Lul-something were asking for backup in guild chat but everyone in their guild sucks so nobody would help them. See, when you mess with a family guild, we might not be individually strong, but we back each other up with numbers. Like ants at a picnic.

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry to say this, but Dredskies really made that post for me. Anyone who just runs past and stops to face-sit on someone they don't like is just... bizarre. Thanks for the LOLs, Birdfall.


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